Tuesday, May 18, 2010

Anger Management Techniques

During business consultations in companies, managers share their personal anger reduction techniques. Here are a few. Practice them:

= use physical energy: run, play a sport, take brisk walks... So channel your built-up emotions.
= write down your angry thoughts, then throw the list into the garbage.
= slow down your reaction time when angry; count to 10 before responding and avoid saying the first thing that comes to your mind.
= if the frustrating person is pushing your anger buttons: use a neutral tone of voice and say excuse me? or "I hear what you're saying" or "clearly it looks like this issue is annoying you"
= if the other person is aggressive and loud: in contrast lower your voice. Your contrasting calmness fills the air.
=summarize what you heard before answering. Do not assume.
= use assertive skills such as: I statements: I feel hurt when you .. Instead of you hurt me by.
= if the other person is incapable of carrying a civil conversation, then shift the conversation to a more neutral topic.
= remember you do not have to win every argument; agree to disagree.
= practice praising in public keeping your criticism to private.
= never use sarcasm; it increases the tension in the air. Instead, turn the humor on you. See yourself as the ruling emperor who has absolute powers to which, the rest of us, your subjects have to kowtow!! Make fun of yourself so bring your inflated ego down to size.

Tuesday, May 4, 2010

Effective Anger Management

Anger is a misunderstood emotion...

Feeling angry is O.K. At the same time, learning to be the master of our emotions rather than their slave makes us winners. It is the way we express anger that may work against us and even get us into trouble.


Look at the anger-prone people you know. Usually they have a low tolerance to frustration. They have issues with what is fair and what is not. They jump to conclusions and say things like: I knew it....didnt you see, he did it on purpose to get me angry. They have black-and-white thinking, so it is either good or it is totally bad. They are rigid and say: he should have never done that to me or this is the right way of doing it...